The prison of disappointment
At the end of the 90’s, the Dutch television invented a new concept for a television program. The concept was really easy. Build a house and place camera’s everywhere. Then let a group of people live there and broadcast everything on television. One of my friends was involved in this project as a camera operative. He told me that although not everything was broadcasted, there were camera’s everywhere in the house. Nothing that happened there remained unseen. In the late 90’s this concept aired on television, and is now known as “Big brother”. It became a huge success and the concept was later sold to many other countries all over the world.
It was very interesting to see how the candidates of this television show behaved during their stay in the Big brother house. The interesting part was that most of them behaved totally different then they would have done without the camera’s around. In the beginning, they were very careful what they said and did. That is what we call performing. But as time passed by, that changed little by little. There was also another very interesting aspect. The group. Every single candidate was adjusting their behavior to the group. Although they became more open as time passed by, there was no one who really was him- or herself during their stay in the Big brother house. The only thing that changed was the way they performed.
The word revelation does not mean that God shows something new. It just means that God removes one of the overlays, so that you will be able to see a little more of the truth. The truth of God is one big picture which we can not handle at once, simply because we cannot understand it at once. Therefore God reveals it to us piece by piece. The more time we spent with Him and with His word, the more of that big picture will be revealed to us. The first revelation that He gave us, was the conviction of sin. It was the moment where we realized in what spiritual condition we were in, the moment where we realized we were in need of grace. Then Jesus Christ was revealed to us as Savior and Messiah and we were able to choose life because of that revelation and because of what He did at Calvary. It was the most important revelation we received in our new spiritual life and a revelation of the grace and love of God, which is available through faith.
In many ways many Christians are behaving like the people who were in the Big brother house. Once we became a Christian, we also became aware of the fact that God sees everything, every single detail. So instead of asking God to help us to change, many Christians simply started to perform. From the outside they seem good Christians, but from the inside they are pretty much the same as when they were when they were born again. As time passes by, they notice that they need to do something. So they start adjusting to “the group”, just as the people in the Big brother house did, still being aware that God’s “camera’s” notice every single detail. In this case “the group” are our own brothers and sisters in Christ. Nowhere in the world you find as much opinions as in the Church. Nowhere in the world there is as much division as in the Church. The result is that these people will follow this opinion at one time, and that opinion the next time, followed by another opinion etc. Meanwhile their lives remain unchanged and they fall from one sin into another, which brings them under curses and demonic influence. Why? Because of a lack of knowledge. And then we’re just talking about the first steps as a Christian, not even about the Christian who did grow to higher spiritual levels. I believe that the majority of the Church of today is still working on their first steps, while there is so much more waiting for them in the storeroom of heaven. But who are these people at the moment nobody is watching? Who are you when nobody is watching? Are you really changed? Or are you still pretty much the same as when you became a Christian? In that case you need to repent. You need salvation. Salvation is not only the beginning point. It is a process. Day by day, moment by moment.
My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge. Because you have rejected knowledge, I also will reject you from being priest for Me.
Hosea 4:6
At this point many people will think this Bible verse is not about them, because they say they accept the knowledge of God. But simply accepting the few verses you hear in the Church every Sunday, is not what this is about. What does the word of God, the highest authority, say again?
Test all things; hold fast what is good. Abstain from every form of evil.
1 Thessalonians 5:21,22
When the word of God tells us to test ALL things, then God means exactly that. It means that we have to test every word, every situation, every person, every opinion, everything. That is the permanent assignment of every Christian. How do we test? Do we test an opinion according to another opinion? I don’t care how “anointed” the people are who give you their opinion. The only thing I care about is about what God says. That is the only thing that matters. There are only two ways to test: according to the Bible and according to the Holy Spirit. You also need to realize that every spirit that tells you the opposite of what is written in the Bible, is not the Holy Spirit. The Bible and the Holy Spirit are always in line with each other.
A lack of knowledge means that you don’t know the word of God. Maybe you do know some parts of the Bible, maybe a few verses, but it still is a lack of knowledge. How can you believe in something you don’t know? It is impossible to believe in something you’re not aware of. If you’re not aware of something, then how can you live by it? The answer is simple. You can’t. That means that you do not only have a lack of knowledge, but also a lack of faith because of the lack of knowledge. Don’t you know what is written in the Bible about how faith comes?
So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.
Romans 10:17
Indeed, faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God. That means knowledge of His word! The more knowledge you have of Gods word, the less chance satan has to fool you, the less chance that you fall for sin. If you are really serious about following Jesus, then this is the place where you have to start. The way that you love Gods word is the way you love God. A lack of knowledge is never an excuse.
If a person sins, and commits any of these things which are forbidden to be done by the commandments of the LORD, though he does not know it, yet he is guilty and shall bear his iniquity.
Leviticus 5:17
Do you want to follow Jesus? Is He really everything to you? Are you really willing to lay down your life and to follow Him, no matter what it cost you? Then you first need to know what it is that God wants from us. That can be found in His word, the Bible. Satan can only get to you at the areas where you do not yet know what the word of God says about it. True freedom only comes by the truth and the truth is the word of God.
If you abide in My word, you are My disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.
John 8:31,32
I can testify personally that I received deliverance from a spirit of adultery, simply by getting to know His truth and applying it. Trust me, I was not convinced about that at all when God told me this. In fact I didn’t believe that it was possible and I already gave up the hope to be free. You can imagine how amazed I was when I afterwards suddenly noticed that I was delivered of this spirit after years of bondage. Thank You Jesus! Your word is still true and Your word is still yes and amen! Your word is POWER!
Alright, so far for the introduction. I didn’t expect to write all this, but apparently the Holy Spirit thinks it’s important. Let’s move forward to the group of Christians who did take more steps in faith and grew to higher spiritual levels. As we move forward, God always gives us new challenges to deal with. New steps in faith to be taken. The further we grow in faith, the more of His truth God reveals to us. In many cases that is something to become very enthusiastic about. In other cases it makes us very sad when God starts to share His heart with us. In both cases we will search Him to ask what He wants us to do. At some moment, our emotions (happiness or sadness) are taking over, and we think we know what God wants us to do next. Before we realize it, we start to move upon our own insight and in our own power, based upon that emotion. Very soon we start to see that it turns into a work of the flesh and it fails. Others do not move, but start to ask Him for His instructions and are already waiting for years. Others are finding their selves in very difficult situations. Many born again and Spirit filled Christians lost their house, or their income, or have very difficult health issues. Meanwhile nothing seems to happen and it seems that God is very silent.
Every single one of us is longing for the glory of God to come down into our lives, into our towns, into our nations, into our Churches. We all want the revival to start and to be a carrier of His glory to a world in need. What most of us do not realize is that we all need to be prepared for that task. The price to become one of His warriors is high. Very high. It will cost you everything. Your character is the first point on Gods priority list. We cannot be a minister of God, when our character doesn’t match His character. When we want to work for Him, we must only carry out what is His. That means that our old self must die totally, so that His life can take all the place in our life’s. This process can hurt. A lot. It will shake your whole life, shake your religious upbringing, shake your securities, everything will be shaken. During this process it also might seem that God has withdrawn Himself from our life’s. It might seem that we are no longer under His grace.
Eventually both groups, the ones who just took a few steps and the ones who took more steps in faith, can come at the point where they see nothing happen in their life’s and where they start to be disappointed. They did so many things for Him, they tried to take so many steps in faith, and yet… nothing special is happening. They are praying, crying out to God, but everything they hear is silence. That also is a part of His test for the true believers. Many Christians stand up and try again, again with ‘failure’ as result. They try and they try and nothing happens. As time passes by, the disappointment starts to become a prison where they cannot escape from. Eventually they give up. Many of you, who read this study, are in that prison. Otherwise the Holy Spirit wouldn’t let me write this study.
God doesn’t allow me to write studies about subjects that I didn’t lived through. I am not offering you some simple theory, I’ve been at the point of desperation and disappointment. I know what it’s like to cry to the heavens without getting any reply. I know that it feels like God has rejected you and I know that it feels like your life is over. And most of all, I know what it feels like not to be able to worship God, not being able to enter His presence. Eventually we give up and stop with everything. To the outside world we’re saying that we are waiting for Him, but in fact we are just standing still and gave up our faith in His solution. In almost all cases we do not realize that we did gave up our faith, but if this is the case in your life, then the Holy Spirit will convince you at this moment, while you are reading this. By giving up our faith in His solution, we’re making Him a liar. By making Him a liar, we are living in sin. By living in sin, we opened the door for satan to destroy our life and it all even becomes worse. At this stage the trap closes and you became a prisoner of disappointment. If this is the case in your life, then you are exactly where satan wants you to be. Again it is a lack of knowledge and it is us rejecting His knowledge, by no longer believing in His solution. God never let’s go of us, but it is us letting go of His truth.
But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.
Hebrews 11:6
A lack of knowledge, leads to a lack of trust. A lack of trust, leads to a lack of faith. A lack of faith leads to a lack of relation. A lack of relation leads to a lack of power. Without faith and power, the gospel is no longer alive in you.
For our gospel did not come to you in word only, but also in power, and in the Holy Spirit and in much assurance, as you know what kind of men we were among you for your sake.
1 Thessalonians 1:5
At the beginning of 2011 I was feeling so desperate. I could no longer worship God, since I didn’t had a place where I could do that without being disturbed. So I also didn’t notice His presence anymore and got home sick for His presence. I missed Him so much that my heart was crying out for His presence again and I just didn’t knew how to get at that place anymore. I also became a prisoner of disappointment. When that happens, when your faith has died inside of you, it affects everything you say and do. Much of what you say is no longer said in faith, but in unbelief. And when we start to talk in unbelief, then satan pays a lot of attention.
Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.
Proverbs 18:21
Unfortunately, many people who read this will recognize their selves in this. Some might even be shocked by it because satan took them by surprise. But I am not writing this to point out how bad you are! Our loving and caring Father, our victorious Lord Jesus Christ and the precious Holy Spirit are loving you so very much, that He wants to offer you the way out of this prison. His grace for you is so enormous, that you can’t even start to imagine. Consider this study as His helping hand that is offered to you for your situation. You are in need of salvation again and He is willing to give it to you, right here, right now.
Alright, here are the keys to get out of that prison. At first you need to realize that both trust and faith are no emotions. That means that you don’t have to feel trust of feel faith in order to have it. It starts with a decision of your will. Yes, emotions are eventually involved, but it starts with a decision of your will. When you stopped trusting God for His solution, when you stopped believing, it was you giving it up. That was a decision of your will as well, and also a sin. But thank God He is willing to forgive you for that. Before you go further, please first take the time to confess these sins and you will be forgiven. You don’t need to pray a long prayer, just keep it simple and confess your sins to Him in short sentences.
Did you confess your sins? Awesome! Then take the time to thank Him, because He just gave you a new huge portion of His grace again! His mercies are brand new for you! Thank You Jesus!!! From this moment you can start over again, with a clean slate.
Most of us know that the Lord Jesus Christ is our High Priest in heaven, Who intercedes for us. But only a few know that the Lord Jesus Christ is not just a High Priest. He is a very specific High Priest. What kind of High Priest?
Therefore, holy brethren, partakers of the heavenly calling, consider the Apostle and High Priest of our confession, Christ Jesus…
Hebrews 3:1
The Lord Jesus Christ is the High Priest of our confession. That means that our Lord only takes action based upon our confessions, based upon our proclamations, that are in line with His will. It means that when we speak in faith, He will stand up on our behalf to make it happen, for the glory of His Name. When you’ve confessed your sins of unbelief and distrust, you are forgiven, and then now is the right time to make a new confession. You can make a decision with your will to trust Him and to believe Him, to believe everything He promised to you personally and in His word. Please take the time to do so now. Don’t just think it, say it, proclaim it. Let the enemy hear you have made your decision! The only way the enemy can keep you in this prison of disappointment, is when you hold on to unbelief and distrust.
When you have confessed your faith and trust in Him again, Jesus Christ is now standing up on your behalf! From this moment on, remember, you have the right and privilege to remain silent. Everything you say that is not according to the will of God, can and will be used against you by the enemy. Don’t give him that chance! Thank You Jesus for interceding on our behalf! You are our Lord, our Master, our Savior, our Messiah! Blessing and honor, glory and power be unto You!
One of the things that bothered me the most was the fact that I couldn’t experience His presence anymore. But then I started to realize that I once again fell in a trap of satan. The enemy made me belief that His presence was no longer available for me, or just at some special moments. Finally I came to the conclusion that it is a lie! Why? Because I confused God’s power with God’s presence. His presence is not a feeling, it’s a fact. What you feel is His power, not His presence. His presence is always with us!
I am with you always, even to the end of the age.
Matthew 28:20
Another lie of the enemy exposed. Never again let him make you believe that God is no longer with you. God’s word says that He is with us always. Believe it! How was this lie exposed? By the written word of God, the Bible. How did I found out about it? By reading the Bible, by studying His word with the help of the Holy Spirit! The only reason why satan was able to get you into that prison, was because you didn’t spent much time studying His word. The Bible contains all the answers, all the solutions to the problems you are facing now. There is much more you need to learn and the Holy Spirit is willing and waiting to show it to you. Just ask Him to teach you His ways before you start reading the Bible. Make His word your own and proclaim the word of God only. Speak in faith!
Therefore, brethren, having boldness to enter the Holiest by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way which He consecrated for us, through the veil, that is, His flesh, and having a High Priest over the house of God, let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.
Hebrews 10:19-23
God’s word, all of His words, are yes and amen. If you will remain standing in faith, all His promises for you will be yours. Just allow Him to change your heart, to change your character according to His own heart and character. When you allow Him to do that, then in His timing you will receive His power and you will be able to minister to a world in need. God knows about your desire to reach a world in need and He is so proud of you when He sees that longing in your heart. But He wants it to last and therefore you need His training first. Accept it, live it, believe it. He will never forsake you, He will never forget you.
Therefore do not cast away your confidence, which has great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise.
Hebrews 10:35,36
